An 18th-century portrait of a powdered and jeweled aristocratic woman in an elaborate cream gown adorned with feathers and gold embroidery dominates the composition, her pale face and rouged cheeks gazing outward with aristocratic poise. Neon pink script reading "Champagne Diet" floats across the dark, moody background in glowing letters, juxtaposing classical portraiture with contemporary pop culture language and creating a playful commentary on excess and indulgence. Sewn from a durable canvas-like exterior with a soft lining and made to order, in three sizes up to one that fits a tablet. A catchall for toiletries, art supplies, or small electronics, carrying an independent artist's work instead of a plain zip bag.